What do I do with a diagnosis?

It can often be a long and difficult process to get your child formally diagnosed with a condition. During this process it is completely normal for you to experience many different emotions including anxiety, fear, sadness, grief, overwhelm, guilt and even relief. Often after a diagnosis is received, people ask me what they now ‘do’ with this diagnosis. And this is a very good question. Receiving a diagnosis can feel like arriving in a foreign land and not knowing how to negotiate the transport, food, language, and culture.

Here’s a few tips to help parents negotiate the period immediately after their child receives a diagnosis.

1. Remember that your precious, unique, loveable, child is still the same precious, unique, loveable child that they were before they received their diagnosis.
2. Your child is not their diagnosis. A diagnosis is a label that explains a set of symptoms or behaviours. It is not a living, breathing, dynamic, developing being. Your child is. See your child as a child, treat them as a child, love them as a child, teach them as a child. Their needs may be different to other children and your expectations may need to change but ultimately your child is a wonderful and exceptional person who will grow and develop in their own way in their own time.
3. Operate on a strength-based model. Focus on what your child can do rather than what they can’t do.
4. Use the diagnosis to gain more clarity on how to help and support your child. See the diagnosis as a loose framework on which you can base your understanding of your child’s needs and make plans to meet these needs.
5. Get in contact with other parents who have a child with the same diagnosis. This could be friends or family you already have contact with, or you may choose to join a parent support group.
6. Inform your child’s school of the diagnosis. Schools are well equipped to support children with a diagnosis. See this article for more information.
7. Get support. Speak with trusted friends or family. Share your feelings, concerns, doubts and fears. Allow yourself to process the diagnosis and be kind to yourself in this process.

Many years after diagnosis of her son’s severe and very rare disability my beautiful sister-in-law commented that upon receiving the diagnosis not one person mentioned the joy or delight that her son would bring her, the amazing memories he would give her, the lessons she would learn from being his mother, or the ongoing resilience, strength and courage that her son would display. Everyone focused on the negative impact of the disability, and no one even contemplated the positive.

I hope that as you love and parent your child the positive will far outweigh the negative and you will be a better, stronger, person because your life has been enriched by your unique and precious child.    

At Lifeworks Psychology we can diagnose intellectual disability, learning disorders such as dyslexia and dysgraphia as well as ADHD. We can also provide support and advice for parents as they process their child’s diagnosis and make plans to meet the needs of their child.

We have appointments available immediately.

Call or email Lifeworks Psychology today – (08) 9382 3645 admin@lifeworkspsych.com.au